Twirl and stir up happy.....journal Oct. 27 2018

Last night was tough, really tough.  When someone is stopped short in the battle with cancer it hurts so many, when it is a child the swing and hit is harder than ever!

On Wednesday nights I get to spend a couple hours with 5th and 6th grade girls.  At least half of this group are girls from a little country school and they are a tight knit bundle of energy.  One little girl did not have a family that attends our regular church services so she was brought by friends and when she was no longer able to attend due to illness she was included in their prayers, conversations and very air they breathed.

Last night as I sat in the church I realized this would be the last time all these little girls would  be together within these church walls.  As I stared at the casket I listened to the gentle sobs around me, and watched tears wiped away as I heard the stories and love these little girls shared.  In the echos of my mind I heard the twinkling sound of their laughter as they visited the stories of their friend and I was touched  at the strength they found in each other and those memories.

I have found as this group wanders through the world they bring some of life’s baggage to go through on Wednesday nights.  I could certainly pass out answers to their woes but I find with some gentle nudging they find their way through just fine  and are quickly back to their joyful, giggling selves.

I sometimes have to stand back as they literally throw their arms in the air and twirl, stirring up all the happy hidden  behind the junk they encounter along the way.


It makes me so sad that they have to endure the loss of a friend at their age, that a family has lost a child and that this young girl’s life was stopped before she was allowed to experience more of the beautiful things life has to offer.  These little girls take comfort in the knowledge their friend is no longer in pain and that they will see her again but the world they wander through is forever changed.

I watched them go through the evening ready to jump in should one of them begin to need more than what was offered for their grieving process.  They looked at pictures, they wrote notes, they created beautiful art as they honored their friend.  I was not needed in their world at that time, and I could feel them bring their friend  with them as they twirled and kicked up all the happy they could find hidden behind the junk.  I listened joyfully as the twinkle of  their laughter met my ears and filled my heart with the knowledge she will never be forgotten and they are going to be ok.

We wander through a world that has some tough stuff to deal with, but if you dare throw your arms in the air, twirl around and stir up some happy along the way!

Living each day like the best day of our lives!


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So sorry for the loss of this precious child!! May God give us the Grace to throw our hands up and twirl!! Thanks for sharing!!! XOXO Lenae
Larissa likes this comment
So sorry for the loss of that dear child. You are doing a wonderful thing, giving of yourself to these young ones in need of guidance. You are a beautiful person who has had to endure so much. We need more like you in this world....and your writing ability deserves an A+
Your story is so amazing, a bitter sweet joy of life. I am so sorry for your loss. The celebration is just wonderful, and I hope this isn't the last church together these girls have, but maybe, they can find a mutual cause, gathering, to continue keeping their friend with them.
Big hugs!
PS: this is the best, most beautiful story I've read on this blog, I hope you will add it to your book! but, I hope it's just part of the chapter.
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Vital Info


August 29, 2009


Cancer Info

Colon and Rectal Cancer

September 28, 2004

Stage 3C

4.1 - 5.0 cm


That affects more than just me.

That I have more strength than I ever imagined.

left with mild neuropothy, balance and memory issues

Cedar Sinai in Beverly Hills California


Write things down, play memory games and games that make you think quickly

Since the first and 1 recurrence I have lived no evidence of disease


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